Is anyone else secretly (or not so secretly) terrified of change?
For anyone who knows me well, you might be laughing at that question. When it comes to change I am about as slow-moving as they come.
Here’s the thing, in some ways change takes a lot of energy. This can serve as a barrier, a risk calculation – will the results of the change justify the amount of energy it’ll take to make the change?
Sometimes this calculation can be beneficial as it allows our executive functioning and reasoning to play through pros and cons; potential rewards, risks, and consequences; and process the change at hand.
However, sometimes we get stuck on the ambiguity of change. The reality we know and exist in is tangible, and for better or worse we know that we have methods of working with that. The change brings potential, but also unknown. It can bring hope, but overall it can be hard to articulate and qualify.
Energy Managment
Let’s think about physical movement and energy expenditure for a moment.
When I’m walking at a consistent pace, I develop a momentum, which allows me to build off of the energy I’ve already exerted to continue my motion.
If I choose to slow down or speed up, or make the initial decision to start moving after being still, this change in movement and pace has a higher metabolic cost (calories burned) than maintaining my consistent momentum.
When we think about change in this way, it makes sense that change requires more energy than maintaining our familiar, consistent routine. Through change we alter our pace, which tampers with our momentum, causing us to exert more energy than we previously were to shift gears and, hopefully, build up a new pace and momentum.
However, what happens when this familiar, consistent routine starts to take too much of our energy?
Studies of physical movement have found that certain paces require higher metabolic costs because rather than creating a momentum from which we can build, they require us to constantly exert energy to maintain the pace.
For those looking for a high calorie-burning workout, this type of physical pace may be particularly appealing. However, when we translate this to change management, it provides a different sort of insight.
What happens when our familiar, consistent routine starts to take too much of our energy?
Maybe this routine no longer lends itself to a energy-saving momentum, but instead causes us to exert extra energy to maintain the pace.
Maybe this routine no longer propels us forward, or challenges us in a way that fosters growth. Maybe the energy we continue to exert stops reaping benefits.
A job or relationship or project that used to align with our values, passions, and goals ceases to align as well as it once did. We now have to expend extra energy to maintain our focus and commitment.
This is related to what I’ve talked about previously regarding time perception. When we are engaged by the experience at hand, we tend to focus more, maintain our attention, and ultimately spend more time on this experience (and the time seems to go by quickly).
When we experience something that doesn’t align with our interests, we struggle to focus, stay attentive, and tend to be extra aware of how much time we’re spending on this experience (it can feel like it lasts forever).
Identity Management
“The biggest problem we run into is going, ‘This is who I am, this is what I’m like, this is how I function’ while failing to notice that you don’t do that anymore.”
— Neil Gaiman
We often form identity around our routines and the stories we tell ourselves about who we are and how that connects to our external world.
Making change can challenge those understandings we develop. Sometimes it can be easier to avoid that challenge to our identity by maintaining what’s consistent, even if it doesn’t quite fit anymore.
But even if we don’t consciously recognize it, there is a toll to holding onto something that no longer aligns. Even if we don’t consciously recognize it, we lose momentum, and the energy we exert actually becomes a force of resistance against our growth and wellbeing.
We spend that energy trying to convince ourselves that this is still a good fit. And we spend that energy on the mental and emotional tolls that arise from the misalignment. We tell ourselves stories of personal limitations and flaws that account for the space between where we are and where we want to be.
It can take courage, vulnerability, and a good deal of energy to address something that is out of alignment in our lives. It can take equal amounts of courage, vulnerability, and energy to then do something about it.
We have the ability to determine who we are and how we want to show up in this world. We exhibit these decisions through the ways we spend our time and energy.
When we explore thoughts of change, or frustrations with where we currently are, it’s worth taking a deeper look at how our time and energy are being spent, and if that expenditure is giving us momentum or holding us back.